DO NOT BACKSLIDE: REMAIN IN CHRIST OUR HOPE

“For He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers to teach to the children, that the coming generation would know them-even children yet to be born-to arise and tell their own children that they should put their confidence in God, not forgetting His works, but keeping His commandments. Then they will not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, whose heart was not loyal, whose spirit was not faithful to God.” -Psalm 78:5-8

Note the contrast in these verses. Those who have hope have put their confidence in God. They are the ones who are trusting in God, believing in Him, following His commands and laws. They are the ones having communion with God. Then, there are the rebellious and stubborn. Those who are hostile and defiant toward God. They are without loyalty or faithfulness.

Let me just talk about backsliding for a few moments. The Bible says this about turning back (backsliding), “As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly. Do you see a man who is wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him,” (Proverbs 26:11-12).

We are to guard our hearts because every decision, every issue of life flows out of our hearts. So, the Scriptures warn us and command us to guard our hearts will all diligence. We are told to be sober-minded as well, clear-headed. Backsliding occurs when a person is set on living a life of impurity. Backsliding can happen when we begin making the smallest of compromises. “The backslider in heart shall be filled with his own ways: and a good man shall be satisfied from himself,” (Proverbs 14:14). The English word “backslider” comes from the transliteration of the Hebrew word, “sûḡ,” which means “apostatize.” Apostasy means to embrace lies instead of truth. Backsliders are those who fall from grace. They are those that apostatize. They are the ones who deviate from the narrow road onto the broad road that leads to destruction. Backsliders go back to their sins just like a dog returns to its own vomit. Backsliders are those who get what they deserve; they will eat the fruit of their own way (Proverbs 1:31). They are filled with their own devices, insistent on living a life of immorality and impurity. For those who backslide and believe they will have time to come back to God, we are not guaranteed our next breath. We don’t know if we will have another chance to repent or come clean before God simply because we are not guaranteed our next breath. God does NOT play games. I’ve said this before I will say it again: there is no neutral ground when it comes to living for God. We must remain steadfast, press forward, without looking back. We must keep our eyes fixed Jesus, looking straight ahead. Don’t look to the right or the left. Continue onward in holiness and righteousness.

“My son, pay attention to my words; incline your ear to my sayings. Do not lose sight of them; keep them within your heart. For they are life to those who find them, and health to the whole body. GUARD YOUR HEART WITH ALL DILIGENCE, FOR FROM IT FLOW SPRINGS OF LIFE. Put away deception you’re your mouth; keep your lips from perverse speech. Let your eyes look forward; fix your gaze straight ahead. Make a level path for your feet, and all your ways will be sure. Do not swerve to the right or to the left; turn your feet away from evil,” (Proverbs 4:20-27)

Our hope is found in Jesus. He is the Author and Finisher of our Faith. He is our Risen Lord and Savior. Those who are putting their faith and trust in Him, believing in Him as their Redeemer will not be put to shame. Our hope is found in no other. Our hope is found in nothing else. Look to Jesus. Obey the commands of the Lord, and march forward, Saints of the God. He alone is our Hope and our Salvation.

Linda A. Knowles

EXACTLY WHAT CONSEQUENCES ARE YOU WILLING TO PAY FOR YOU TO DO IT YOUR WAY?

“Jesus continued, “You are from below; I am from above. You belong to this world; I do not. That is why I said that you will die in your sins; for unless you believe that I Am who I claim to be, you will die in your sins,” (John 8:23-24). The Religious Leaders and Pharisees were committing the sin of unbelief.  They did not believe Jesus was the Messiah. They did not trust in Jesus. Belief in Jesus is not just believing Jesus is who He says He is. Belief in Jesus also means trusting in Him. It means hoping in Him. It is believing with all our hearts that He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. It is believing that Jesus is the only means of salvation.

Unbelief is a sin just like lying or stealing or anything else that goes contrary to what God says. When there is unbelief, rebellion and hostility are present. When there is rebellion and hostility, darkness overtakes.  When darkness overtakes, there is absence of light. When there is absence of light, only ego and self are left.  When ego and self are left, man is his own god.  When man is his own god, then idolatry consumes.  When idolatry consumes, other lawless activities exist and thrive. When lawlessness exists and thrives, destruction is its wages.

What is sin? Sin is anything that goes completely contrary to the law of God. “Everyone who sins is breaking God’s law, for all sin is contrary to the law of God,” (1 John 3:4). Sin is lawlessness. Lawlessness is iniquity and disobedience. Lawlessness is sin. If God says something is evil, it’s evil. When God says something is evil, we are not to do it. “What sorrow for those who say that evil is good and good is evil, that dark is light and light is dark, that bitter is sweet and sweet is bitter. What sorrow for those who are wise in their own eyes and think themselves so clever,” (Isaiah 5:20-21).

What does sin do? “Because he hath despised the word of the LORD, and hath broken his commandment, that soul shall utterly be cut off; his iniquity shall be upon him,” (Numbers 15:31). Sin cuts us off from God, separating us from Him. Sin will have us living in darkness. Sin will have us traveling down the broad road to destruction. It causes us to trample the Word of God and the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross.

What happens when we sin? When we sin, we grieve the Holy Spirit. We need to understand that the Holy Spirit dwelling within us (the very presence of Almighty God) is so holy, that He (the Holy Spirit) cannot tolerate sin in any degree. The Holy Spirit will only reside in a clean temple. “Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, glorify God with your body,” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). It is imperative that we understand the spiritual fatality of sin.  Those who practice sin are defiled. If we call evil good and good evil, sorrow awaits us.  If we call light dark and dark light, sorrow awaits us. When we submit and surrender to the culture and world we live in rather than submitting and surrendering to God, sorrow awaits us. Sin only brings death and destruction.

“You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you, for he wrote, ‘These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.  Their worship is a farce, for they teach man-made ideas as commands from God,’” (Matthew 15:7-9). GOD REQUIRES OUR HEART. We have the tendency to look at someone’s outer appearance, but God does not look at the outer appearance. The Scriptures states, “But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart,’” (1 Samuel 16:7). The condition of our heart matters to God. The motives and intentions of one’s heart must be right in the eyes of God. The applause of men is all we will get if that is what we seek. All that matters is that we are seeking the Lord’s approval. If we don’t have God’s approval, nothing else will matter. We must have an undivided, unwavering heart in walking with the Lord. Walking with God and living for God is not for the faint of heart. Are we worshiping God in spirit and in truth? Are we loyal and faithful to God? Do we walk before God with an undivided heart? Are we in right relationship with God? When no one is looking, how are we living?

Previously I stated that we cannot be holy and worldly at the same time. Holiness and worldliness are in direct opposition to each other. If we are a friend of the world, then we make ourselves an enemy of God (James 4:4).  The Word declares, “You adulterers! Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God. Do you think the Scriptures have no meaning? They say that God is passionate that the spirit he has placed within us should be faithful to him. And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say, ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’ So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you,” (James 4:4-7). Do you we want to be an enemy of God or a friend of God? To be a friend of God, we cannot be a friend of the world. We cannot be practicing a life of sin. Each of us has one life to live. We either live for God or we do not. How we live is a matter of spiritual life or death. Are we living for the Lord? Do we know where we will spend eternity? There is only one life to live. So, how are we living this one life?

The Psalmist declared, “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” To line up our thoughts with God’s thoughts, we need to study the Scriptures. To know how to live a pure and holy life, we need to study the Scriptures. It is within its pages we see the promises of God. Within its pages, we see the nature and character of God unfold before us. Within its pages, we receive encouragement, reproof, instruction, and hope. In the Scriptures, we find comfort. 

When there has been no inward transformation that results in living a life of righteousness and holiness before God, outward displays of sacrificial praise mean absolutely nothing. In other words, we could stand in church shouting “Praise the Lord!  Glory to God!” However, if we are not living pure and upright before the Lord, then our praise and worship is meaningless. God has made it very clear what He requires, “No, O people, the LORD has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God,” (Micah 6:8). There is no break from walking in purity and holiness before God. If there is any sin in our life, we are to confess our sin before the Lord and repent with a contrite heart.  We are to turn from our wicked ways and never go back to those wicked ways. The Lord has told us what He requires. He is not impressed with shows of pomposity, pretense, and hypocrisy. Remember this:  “Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed,” (Proverbs 12:19). 

Linda A. Knowles

SO YOU WANT TO CONCEAL YOUR SECRET SINS, YOUR SECRET LIFE?

“What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs—beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people’s bones and all sorts of impurity.  Outwardly you look like righteous people, but inwardly your hearts are filled with hypocrisy and lawlessness.” -Matthew 23: 27-28

The word “whitewash” absolutely fascinates me.  It means to cover up, to camouflage, to gloss over, and to sugarcoat.  Whitewash is also a form of paint that is made up of slaked lime powder, chalk, water, and other ingredients.  The ornate buildings found in a cemetery are whitewashed tombs.  The whitewashed tombs are filled the bones of those who have passed on.

In this passage of Scripture, Jesus likens the Religious Leaders and the Pharisees to whitewashed tombs.  In other words, they looked wonderful in the outer appearance. They followed the law in the presence of people. They were dressed beautifully in their long flowing robes. They followed all the religious ceremonial laws, and yet they were practicing a life of sin behind closed doors. They had hidden sins, and Jesus was calling them out on their hidden sins. So whatever sins they believed they had concealed were exposed by Jesus.

Isaiah 29:15 states, “‘Woe to those who seek deep to hide their counsel far from the LORD, And their works are in the dark; They say, ‘Who sees us?’ and, ‘Who knows us?’” The people of Jerusalem were concealing their evil behavior. Having to conceal their wicked behavior clearly indicated they knew they had sinned. They kept continuing to practice a life of sin. They convinced themselves to believe that God did not see or know what they were doing. The people of Jerusalem also were trying to conceal their true intentions and motives from the Lord. Before we are harsh in our thinking towards the people of Jerusalem, we are not that much different in today’s churches.

“Those who seek deep to hide their counsel far from the LORD” is a description of one who attempts to cover and conceal his or her actual intentions for evil.  Outwardly, they come across as sincere. Their appearance may look good.  Their speech may be influential and convincing.  They may even sound credible. The problem is that those who conceal their sins or their double life are filled with dead men bones.  Their fake displays of piety, going through the motions, and presenting themselves as men or women of God are the whitewashing of the tombs that contain the bones of dead men. Inwardly, the foulness of pretense and hypocrisy is the stench behind the doors of the whitewashed tombs (evildoers, hypocrites, deceivers, liars, and the like). We have the capability of deceiving ourselves that God does not see or know what we are doing in secret when no one is looking. When we try to conceal sin of any kind, we are nothing but whitewashed tombs filled with a stench that rises up to the nostrils of God who sees and knows the sins we commit.

It is essential to understand that we cannot conceal sin. God is El Roi (The God Who Sees Me). Proverbs 8:13 states this, “The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate.” Before God, everything is laid out. Nothing is hidden.  Everything is stripped bare. We should never be so foolish to believe we can conceal any sin from God. 

Linda A. Knowles

What is your god?

“For the LORD is great and greatly to be praised; He is to be feared above all gods. For the gods of the peoples are idols, But the LORD made the heavens.” -Psalm 96:45 NKJV

What is your god?  Before you answer too quickly, think about it.  What is your god?  Sports, Cooking Shows, Cell Phone, Television, Internet, Social Media?  Is it seeking the approval of men, wealth, prestige, or popularity, or is it something else?  An idol is whatever takes God’s rightful place in our heart.  Whatever we have set all of our affections and adoration on, whatever sits upon the throne of our life is our idol.  God must come first in our lives.  God must be the one we seek to live for first (Matthew 6:33), the one we seek to please first, and it is His approval we must first gain (Galatians 1:10).

It is vital that each of us guard our heart because every decision, every action, whether or not we follow God stems from the heart. Why should we guard our heart so diligent? (1) Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.  Reference Luke 6:45;  (2) Your heart will determine the course of your life. Reference Proverbs 4:23;  (3) Your beliefs about God and who He is comes from the heart.  “But what does it say?  ‘The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,’ that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: that if you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.  For with your heart you believe in and justified, and with your mouth you confess and are saved,” Romans 10:8-10; (4) Wherever your treasure is (what you value and cherish most, what you cling to) that is where your heart lies.

What is your god?  Each of us as individuals must decide if we will rid our lives of idolatry and repent for putting other things as first place in our lives.  We cannot be a friend of this world and be a friend of God.  To be a friend of the world is to be an enemy of God.  Nothing is worth losing your soul over.  The Lord is to be our First Love always.

“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and for the gospel will save it.  What does it profit a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?” (Mark 8:35-36)

In His Service,

Linda A. Knowles

THE DEMON CHALICE

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THE DEMON CHALICE

By Linda A. Knowles

Thursday, 12/10/2020

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You chose to drink from the demon chalice,

Which was passed all around;

Then you chose the chains,

That now have you bound.

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You bought the lies,

And you bought into the deceit;

You sold out to gratify your fleshly need.

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You chose the honey from Timnath,

And you filled yourself with her seductive,

sensual intoxicating wine,

Drinking yourself into a deep sleep,

Cheapening your own life.

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You should have been vigilant and sober minded

But your lust-crazed mind and soul has left you bound;

Your lust-crazed heart has left you spiritually blinded.

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You drank from the demon chalice;

Tell me, who can help you now,

Since you’ve chosen to swim in willful ignorance

while drowning in disgrace?

Build Your Foundation On The Rock

“Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and not do what I tell you? Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it, immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great.” -Luke 6:46-49 ESV


The foundation upon which you build your life upon matters. Eventually when the storms of life strike that is when the foundation of your life will be tested and tried. Are you building your life upon Jesus Christ, the Sure Foundation, or are you building your life upon what is temporary? Be like the wise man who dug deep and laid the foundation of his house upon the rock that could not be shaken when it was struck.

Linda A. Knowles

Point of No Return

“Then the LORD said to me: ‘Even if Moses and Samuel should stand before Me, My heart would not go out to this people. Send them from My presence, and let them go. If they ask you, ‘Where shall we go?’ you are to tell them that this is what the LORD says: ‘Those destined for death, to death; those destined for the sword, to the sword; those destined for famine, to famine; and those destined for captivity, to captivity.'” (Jeremiah 15:1-2 Berean Study Bible)

I did a doubletake reading this Scripture when I saw it said, “Even if Moses and Samuel should stand before me, My heart would not go out to this people.” Moses and Samuel were both prophets of God. They were two of the greatest prophets amongst the other prophets we see in the Scriptures. The people of Judah had come to the point of no return.

Not even Moses or Samuel would have been able to intercede for the people of Judah at this point. Judah had abandoned God and traded God for the religious systems of men, had adopted the culture of pagan nations, and worshipping the idols/gods of the nations around them. Jeremiah had already been told “As for you, do not pray for these people. Do not raise up a cry or a prayer on their behalf, for I will not be listening when they call out to Me at the time of their disaster, ” (Jeremiah 11:14BSB).

Intercession for the people of Judah would have been rendered ineffective even if Moses and Samuel were standing before God interceding on their behalf. God wasn’t even listening to the people of Judah cry out to Him because they only cried out to Him when they were in trouble. God was angry and told Jeremiah, “Therefore this is what the LORD says: ‘I am about to bring upon them a disaster that they cannot escape. They will cry out to Me, but I will not listen to them. Then the cities of Judah and the residents of Jerusalem will go and cry out to the gods to which they have been burning incense, but these gods certainly will not save them in their time of disaster. Your gods are indeed as numerous as your cities, O Judah; the altars of shame you have set up—the altars to burn incense to Baal—are as many as the streets of Jerusalem.” (Jeremiah 11:11-13) They didn’t commune with God. They were committing the act of spiritual adultery, acting as prostitutes giving themselves away to every pagan deity and were told by God through the prophet Jeremiah “How you plot and scheme to win your lovers. Even an experienced prostitute could learn from you!” (Jeremiah 2:33BSB) They had no shame and could not even blush anymore. They flagrantly flaunted their spiritual adultery and their idolatry in the face of God.

GOD DOESN’T PLAY GAMES. God warned them over and over again, but the stench of their sin had risen up before Him, and they were only sorry they had gotten caught in their sin. They were not repentant for their sins of abandoning God and trading Him in for the religious systems of man, their spiritual adultery, and their idolatry.

This cannot get more sobering than this statement made to Jeremiah by God, “As for you, do not pray for these people. Do not raise up a cry or a prayer on their behalf, for I will not be listening when they call out to Me at the time of their disaster.” Will you allow yourself to be found in the same spiritual condition as the people of Judah? Would God tell someone not to pray for you?

THERE IS NO NEUTRAL GROUND WHEN IT COMES TO SERVING GOD. I will be saying that until there is no longer breath in my body. There is no neutral ground when it comes to serving the Lord. CHOOSE YOU THIS DAY WHOM YOU WILL SERVE.

We have been chosen by Christ to go and bear fruit. Every tree that does not bear fruit will be chopped down and burnt up (Matthew 3:10, 7:19).

“You adulterers! Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God. Do you think the Scriptures have no meaning? They say that God is passionate that the spirit he has placed within us should be faithful to him. And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say, ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’” (James 4:4-6NLT)

Remember God does NOT bless a life of disobedience, but He does bless a life of obedience. He lavishes grace and mercy upon His children who are loving Him with all their heart, mind, soul, and strength. Favor is the shield around His children.

“For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.” Repent so you are not found in the same position as the people of Judah. God had enough of their foolish behavior. Do NOT bring God to the point where God tells someone not to pray for you anymore because of your stubborn, hardened, and calloused heart. There is a time when God says, “Enough” as we have seen here with Jeremiah.

There is no neutral ground when it comes to God. You are either on God’s side or you’re not. You cannot claim to live for God and love the things of this world; in other words, you cannot be a friend of God if you are a friend of the world. The God of the Old Testament is still God in the New Testament. God promises restoration, hope, and healing for those who are truly repentant with contrite hearts, those who recognize their need of the one and only Savior.

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, You are the One and Only God. You are the Creator of the Heavens and the Earth. No one compares to You. You are sovereign and holy, and You do not share Your glory with another. Father, I will seek Your righteousness first and I will follow Your ways. I will obey Your commands and cling tightly to Your truth. I choose to serve You and You alone. Thank You for being my God and my Father. Thank You for Your instruction and Your discipline. Thank You for choosing me to go and bear fruit. Be with me as I follow Your commands and seek out Your ways. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Linda A. Knowles

Fixated

When our minds are fixated on those who oppose us, who are the children of GOD, we are only adding fuel to the fire of our anger and our confusion. Those who oppose us are not ours to worry about. GOD will take care of the opposition. Unless we truly let go, we will never have peace of mind. When we are fixated upon those who oppose us, those who speak ill of us, those who are trying to harm us, then we are not trusting in GOD.

SHIFT THE FOCUS: In Isaiah 26:3-4 (Berean Study Bible), it states, “3You will keep in perfect peace the steadfast of mind, because he trusts in You. 4Trust in the LORD forever, because GOD the LORD is the Rock eternal.” Rather than focus on the opposition, which is as fleeting as the grass that eventually withers away, focus on what is eternal such as reflecting on the laws and the commands of GOD and concerning yourself with obeying Him, not caring about the approval or the applause of people. When you begin to think and speak about the goodness of GOD, you will find yourself experiencing the peace that comes from GOD alone. Your soul cannot remain in a downcast state when you are letting the fruit of your lips be thanksgiving and praise to GOD, and you will experience true joy rising up within you. Your mind will not stay overwhelmed and weighed down when you are thinking about what is noble, honorable, trustworthy, and of good report. Trust in GOD, and let it go.

“6Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:6-7 (NLT)

Linda A. Knowles

Live Out The Word of God In Every Aspect of Your Life.

Wednesday, October 30, 2019

Confessions #3: The Great Copier Heaven In The Sky

Confessions of a Former Church Secretary #3

THE GREAT COPIER HEAVEN IN THE SKY

By Linda A. Knowles

Brother Vincent, an elder in the church, grunted a hello at Poppy. He came over to her as she was throwing out a copier. When he saw what she was doing, he stood between her and the copier and sternly raised his voice, “Poppy, what are you doing?! Copiers cost a lot of money! Don’t you understand this?! You cannot throw this away!”

“But, Brother Vincent, it’s broken. Even the Copier Repair Man couldn’t resuscitate this thing. It prints globs of black ink on the paper and it failed every test the Copier Repair Man gave it. There is no redemption for this copier. “

But Brother Vincent insisted, “Call the Copier Guy again and have him come to fix it.”

“Brother Vincent, it would cost another $600.00 to get the Copier Repair Man back out here. They sent out what’s called a Specialist Copier Repair Man already. He said and I’m quoting the Specialist. He said, ‘How do I break this to you gently, Poppy? Your Copier has passed from this life into its next life to the Great Copier Heaven in the sky.'”

“So it’s not good then?”

“No, Brother Vincent, I’m sorry, but this copier is as dead as a doorknob.”

Brother Vincent was quiet for a moment as she could see he was thinking, “We may one day need to use this copier. So put it back in storage.”

“Brother Vincent, we have no storage room and it’s broken.”

“Well it prints. It just prints with globs of black ink. So it prints just not correctly so it’s still good. Just put it in storage. Do what I said,” he then left the office.

Pastor Grant came in and saw Poppy puzzled as she was putting the copier in the other room, “Didn’t you move that same copier out here to get rid of it?”

“Yes, Pastor.”

“Then, why are you moving it back to the other room?”

“Pastor Grant, Brother Vincent is 90 years old, and I have to respect my elders. I’m trying to make sure that if he strokes out that it is not because of me. It has to be because you told him the copier has got to go. Besides, you’re the Pastor. He has to listen to you.”

Confessions #2: Look How Well It Worked For Him.

Confessions of a Former Church Secretary #2

LOOK HOW WELL IT WENT FOR HIM!

By Linda A. Knowles

Wally came in for his work shift at the church. He was busy getting the trash from the administrative offices. Wally looked distraught so Poppy, who was sitting at her desk doing paperwork, figured she might as well ask, “Wally, what’s wrong?”

Wally looked at her, “Well, Ma’am, I’ve tried everything. I tried being a garbage man. That didn’t work and then I tried being a truck driver. That didn’t work either, and I have had a number of other jobs: What’s the name of that donut shop? It’s like two minutes up the street. I tried food delivery. You get the point. Now I have decided there is only one other thing that I have to try because it’s the only answer.”

Poppy now curious, “So what are you going to be now?”

Wally declared, “I’m going to be a pastor.” Poppy’s mouth hung open and was unable to find any words, “You see, Ma’am, nothing else has worked. So clearly the only right option is for me is to be a pastor.”

Poppy said in complete disbelief, finding her words, “But you hate working! You can’t even show up for your shift on time here at the church! What are you going to do as a Pastor?! You are aware Pastors do work, right?”

He looked at Poppy and spoke rather nonchalantly about being a pastor, “Look at how well it worked for Pastor Grant! He has it made in the shade.” Poppy was shaking her head and looking at Wally at the horror of the image she had of Wally being a pastor as he continued to talk, “I’m serious, Ma’am. Look at how well it worked for him! He sits back in his chair, talks for an hour on Wednesday, talks for an hour on Sunday morning and on Sunday Night. And he rakes in the cash!”

Poppy’s composure was about to give way, but she managed to keep her composure together as Wally continued to talk, “He has no worries, Ma’am! Everything goes well for him,” Poppy found herself tilting her head to the side as she was looking at Wally wondering to herself if she was really hearing what she was hearing as Wally continued to talk, “How difficult can it be to serve communion? Others do it for him. He has everyone doing everything for him. Look at how well it has worked for him! He doesn’t have to do anything. He just comes in, sits back in his chair, and he reads.”

Poppy looked at him, beside herself, “No, no, no, he doesn’t just read…”

Wally interjected, “Yes, Ma’am, he does. I’ve seen him. What would you know about what he does?!”

Poppy looked at him sternly and said, “I’m Pastor Grant’s secretary! Do you have any idea what it takes to be a pastor?! Can you do the preparatory work to be a pastor?! Do you know that being a pastor is a calling not just something to do?! Are you ready to buckle down to study Hermeneutics, Eschatology, Old Testament Survey, New Testament Survey?! Could you even sit long enough to study those and those are not the only other subjects you would have to study?! You think Pastor Grant does nothing! Have you seen his schedule?! He does hospital visits, is the chairman at every board meeting, has to keep up with the state of his flock no matter how many there are! He is on the phone praying with people, attends the week day and even night prayer meetings, meets with ministry leaders on a bi-weekly basis, disciples and mentors about five people at the moment, equips the members of the congregation to evangelize. He does marriage counseling, family counseling, and individual counseling! He leads an evangelism team and goes evangelizing in the inner city! He meets with city officials and serves on the board of the local bible college! So are you really thinking that being a pastor is the right option for you?!”

Wally was scratching his head and seemingly confused, “Ma’am, I have only one question.”

Scowling, Poppy asked, “What’s your question?”

Wally stated, “What do you mean by he has to keep up with the state of his flock?”

Poppy sighed, “Lord, help me.”

Confessions #1: Yeah, but is blood gushing out?

Photo From clker.com

CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER CHURCH SECRETARY 1:

YEAH, BUT IS BLOOD GUSHING OUT?

By Linda A. Knowles

No one knows that the church secretary has many bosses as the church has members! At least that is what some church members think.

Daisy can never forget this one particular day, a member of the church who was named Juniper came up to the reception counter, “Daisy, I want to see the Pastor and I want to see him now.”

Daisy responded, “The Pastor is in prayer right now, but he should be finished in about two hours.”

This answer didn’t make Juniper a happy little camper and she became angry, raising her voice, “It’s an emergency, and you need to do your job and interrupt him now!”

Daisy was puzzled by Juniper’s demand and why she was raising her voice at Daisy who trying not to laugh at Juniper’s facial expressions, and Daisy responded accordingly, “I was told by the the Pastor that he is not to be interrupted by anything short of the building being on fire. Therefore, I cannot interrupt him unless you, someone else, or something has set the building on fire.”

All of sudden Juniper burst through the administrative office door which Daisy had forgotten to lock when Daisy had come in that morning and Juniper slammed the door shut.

“Why don’t you do your job?”

Daisy responded, “I am.” Then Daisy reached over and opened the administrative office door and kindly said, “I would appreciate it if you could please leave the office. I will let him know you stopped by when he is done.”

Clearly from the look on her face Juniper was more angry and so Juniper towered over Daisy, and Daisy just looked at her trying to remain serious and not burst out laughing. Daisy asked her, “Is there a problem?”

Juniper responded, “I pay YOUR salary and I pay tithes, and I expect YOU to do your job. “

Then Daisy proceeded to ask, “Did anyone fall and crack their head open?”

She yelled, “No, what kind of a stupid question is that?!”

Daisy said, “A perfectly legitimate question. Is blood gushing out of anyone because that would constitute an emergency?”

Juniper was exasperated and yelled louder, “DAISY! What is wrong with you? No one is gushing blood and no one needs an ambulance in case that is your next question.”

Daisy said, “I wasn’t going to ask you if anyone was in need of an ambulance. I had to determine the nature of the emergency. However, I was going to ask you if you or if anyone was stroking out or about to stroke out because we have a doctor on the premises right now.”

She screamed, “You are incorrigible.”

Suddenly Daisy burst out laughing, “I may be stubborn and obstinate, but I am not incorrigible.”